


Spiteful cat (randomly generated screenplay)

by xburningwirex



Category: Sparklecare (Webcomic)
Genre: Bc everyone knows that if Andy comes back, Bee is doing her best, Bee is slightly OOC, Don't Read This, Dr sunshine is dead😳, F/M, Gen, Max is so OOC in this i, Random & Short, Screenplay/Script Format, This Is STUPID, and it made this shit, do yall get Sunny's name pun?, i put my characters names into a script generator, if you know me...., im crying so loudly at this oh my gods, like his singing voice lmao, no u dont❤, she'd immediately take him back so-, so is Sunny (Dr. Suzshein), some parts actually make sense for some reason, thats how Sunny sounds like btw, the song is a bop go n listen to it, this is a joke, this is so cursed omfg, um
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:35:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27549205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xburningwirex/pseuds/xburningwirex
Summary: um....Chile👁👄👁I took a random screenplay/script generator and it made whatever this is,,, and tbh some parts are actually good??? I'm shocked lmaoooplease don't read this-
Relationships: Bee Peedee/Andy Freise, Bee Peedee/Max E. Muum
Kudos: 1





	Spiteful cat (randomly generated screenplay)

# Spiteful Cat

A Screenplay by crimeinmoominvalley

**INT. SPARKLECARE HOSPITAL, COUNTRYLAND COUNTRY - AFTERNOON**

Kind patient BEE PEEDEE is arguing with clever patient ANDY FRIESE. BEE tries to hug ANDY but he shakes her off.

BEE  
Please Andy, don't leave me.

ANDY  
I'm sorry Bee, but I'm looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces her fears head-on, instead of running away.

BEE  
I am such a person!

ANDY frowns.

ANDY  
I'm sorry, Bee. I just don't feel excited by this relationship anymore.

ANDY leaves.

BEE sits down, looking defeated.

Moments later, quiet patient MAX E. MUUM barges in looking flustered.

BEE  
Goodness, Max! Is everything okay?

MAX  
I'm afraid not.

BEE  
What is it? Don't keep me in suspense...

MAX  
It's ... a cat ... I saw an evil cat kill a bunch of patients!

BEE  
 _Defenseless_ patients?

MAX  
Yes, defenseless patients!

BEE  
Bloomin' heck, Max! We've got to do something.

MAX  
I agree, but I wouldn't know where to start.

BEE  
You can start by telling me where this happened.

MAX  
I was...

MAX fans himself and begins to wheeze.

BEE  
Focus Max, focus! Where did it happen?

MAX  
sparklecare hospital, countryland country! That's right - sparklecare hospital, countryland country!

BEE springs up and begins to run.

  


**EXT. A ROAD - CONTINUOUS**

BEE rushes along the street, followed by MAX. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.

  


**INT. SPARKLECARE HOSPITAL, COUNTRYLAND COUNTRY - SHORTLY AFTER**

SUNZSHEIN IZDED a spiteful cat terrorizes two patients.

BEE, closely followed by MAX, rushes towards SUNZSHEIN, but suddenly stops in her tracks.

MAX  
What is it? What's the matter?

BEE  
That's not just any old cat, that's Sunzshein Izded!

MAX  
Who's Sunzshein Izded?

BEE  
Who's Sunzshein Izded? _Who's Sunzshein Izded?_ Only the most spiteful cat in the universe!

MAX  
Blinkin' knickers, Bee! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most spiteful cat in the universe!

BEE  
You can say that again.

MAX  
Blinkin' knickers, Bee! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most spiteful cat in the universe!

BEE  
I'm going to need fire, lots of fire.

Sunzshein turns and sees Bee and Max. He grins an evil grin.

SUNZSHEIN  
Bee Peedee, we meet again.

MAX  
You've met?

BEE  
Yes. It was a long, long time ago...

  


**EXT. A PARK - BACK IN TIME**

A young BEE is sitting in a park listening to some rock music, when suddenly a dark shadow casts over her.

She looks up and sees SUNZSHEIN. She takes off her headphones.

SUNZSHEIN  
Would you like some chocolate?

BEE's eyes light up, but then he studies SUNZSHEIN more closely and looks uneasy.

BEE  
I don't know, you look kind of bad.

SUNZSHEIN  
Me? No. I'm not bad. I'm the least bad doctor in the world.

BEE  
Wait, you're a doctor?

BEE runs away, screaming.

  


**INT. SPARKLECARE HOSPITAL, COUNTRYLAND COUNTRY - PRESENT DAY**

SUNZSHEIN  
You were a coward then, and you are a coward now.

MAX  
(To BEE) You ran away?

BEE  
(To MAX) I was a young child. What was I supposed to do?

BEE turns to SUNZSHEIN.

BEE  
I may have run away from you then, but I won't run away this time!

BEE runs away.

She turns back and shouts.

BEE  
I mean, I _am_ running away, but I'll be back - _with fire_.

SUNZSHEIN  
I'm not scared of you.

BEE  
You should be.

  


**INT. SPARKLECARE HOSPITAL, COUNTRYLAND COUNTRY - LATER THAT DAY**

BEE and MAX walk around searching for something.

BEE  
I feel sure I left my fire somewhere around here.

MAX  
Are you sure? It does seem like an odd place to keep deadly fire.

BEE  
You know nothing Max E. Muum.

MAX  
We've been searching for ages. I really don't think they're here.

Suddenly, SUNZSHEIN appears, holding a pair of fire.

SUNZSHEIN  
Looking for something?

MAX  
Crikey, Bee, he's got your fire.

BEE  
Tell me something I don't already know!

MAX  
The earth's circumference at the equator is about 40,075 km.

BEE  
I know that already!

MAX  
I like you..

SUNZSHEIN  
(appalled) Dude!

While SUNZSHEIN is looking at MAX with disgust, BEE lunges forward and grabs her deadly fire. He wields them, triumphantly.

BEE  
Prepare to die, you spiteful carrot!

SUNZSHEIN  
No, please! All I did was kill a bunch of patients!

ANDY enters, unseen by any of the others.

BEE  
I cannot tolerate that kind of behavior! Those patients were defenseless! Well now they have a defender - and that's me! Bee Peedee defender of innocent patients.

SUNZSHEIN  
Don't hurt me! Please!

BEE  
Give me one good reason why I shouldn't use this fire on you right away!

SUNZSHEIN  
Because Bee, I am your father.

BEE looks stunned for a few moments but then collects herself.

BEE  
No, you're not!

SUNZSHEIN  
Ah well, it had to be worth a try.

SUNZSHEIN tries to grab the fire but BEE dodges out of the way.

BEE  
Who's the daddy now? Huh? _Huh?_

Unexpectedly, SUNZSHEIN slumps to the ground.

MAX  
Did he just faint?

BEE  
I think so. Well, that's disappointing. I was rather hoping for a more dramatic conclusion, involving my deadly fire.

BEE crouches over SUNZSHEIN's body.

MAX  
Be careful, Bee. It could be a trick.

BEE  
No, it's not a trick. It appears that... It would seem... Sunzshein Izded is dead!

BEE  
What?

BEE  
Yes, it appears that I scared him to death.

MAX claps her hands.

MAX  
So your fire did save the day, after all.

ANDY steps forward.

ANDY  
Is it true? Did you kill the spiteful cat?

BEE  
Andy how long have you been...?

ANDY puts his arm around BEE.

ANDY  
Long enough.

BEE  
Then you saw it for yourself. I killed Sunzshein Izded.

ANDY  
Then the patients are safe?

BEE  
It does seem that way!

A crowd of vulnerable patients enters, looking relieved.

ANDY  
You are their hero.

The patients bow to BEE.

BEE  
There is no need to bow to me. I seek no worship. The knowledge that Sunzshein Izded will never kill patients ever again, is enough for me.

ANDY  
You are humble as well as brave!

One of the patients passes BEE a pink Hairbow

ANDY  
I think they want you to have it, as a symbol of their gratitude.

BEE  
I couldn't possibly.

Pause.

BEE  
Well, if you insist.

BEE takes the Hairbow.

BEE  
Thank you.

The patients bow their heads once more and leave.

BEE turns to ANDY.

BEE  
Does this mean you want me back?

ANDY  
Oh, Bee, of course, I want you back!

BEE smiles for a few seconds, but then looks defiant.

BEE  
Well, you can't have me.

ANDY  
 _WHAT?_

BEE  
You had no faith in me. You had to see me scare a cat to death before you would believe in me. I don't want a lover like that.

ANDY  
But...

BEE  
Please leave. I want to spend time with the one person who stayed with me through thick and thin - my best friend, Max.

MAX grins.

ANDY  
But...

MAX  
You heard the lady. Now be off with you. Skidaddle! Shoo!

ANDY  
Bee?

BEE  
I'm sorry Andy, but I think you _should_ skidaddle.

ANDY leaves.

MAX turns to BEE.

MAX  
Did you mean that? You know ... that I'm your best friend?

BEE  
Of course you are!

The two walk off arm in arm.

Suddenly MAX stops.

MAX  
When I said I like you, you know I was just trying to distract the cat, don't you?

THE END


End file.
